Me and my heart we've got issues.

I'm a little here and there. Let's just say I'm a little bit all over the places, not being able to tell myself that i'm officialy STABLE. I'm emotionally, spiritually and pysically unstable and erm it's a lilttle crappy.
I've stopped blogging since ages ago, i knw~ An undeniable fact that i did abandon my blog -like months ago?.
I'm struggling with 'only God knows how it feels like to be me' issue.
Tiny bits of here and there which sums up to this crappy-indescribable-feeling.

I kinda get it, it's a mixture of everything.

Well, I started off with college in May, and I can say that everything was smooth.
I know He's with me all the time and I'm so in love with Him.
But there are times I just feel like life is so meaningless, it's as if im chasing after the wind.

1 Corinthians 9:26- NLT
So I run with purpose in every step,
I am not just shawdow-boxing.

Somehow;somewhut,
this verse assured me that I'm not running and doing things that are purposeless in life.
I have a purpose in life and God has a future and a plan for me.

as stated in Jeremiah 29: 11,
For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord
plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans for hope and a future.

Everything was clearly stated and I fully understood it but there are times where I'm lost somewhere in the middle of something and everything seems so blurry and this very crappy-feeling i've been struggling with will eventually take control of me and I don't know what to do.

I haven't been consistent in practically everything I do. I guess that's the root-problem. That's the main reason why I've been so indulged with this crappy feelings for a couple of months. or maybe yrs?

I'm done with my first semester in college, i'm so done with my finals and now i'm on hols and it doesn't feel like I'm relaxing or having a great time of my life. I'm not on holiday-mood i guess?

lol~ to~that

Neways, I'm dealing with an issue I don't fully understand. Nobody knows how it feels like only He knows. I've been talking to Him about it but I guess it's time for me to pull up my socks and tell myself that it's time to be serious. It's a matter of fact that I haven't been serious all this while. I told myself that I will but I didn't.

It's time to put a big full stop to this un-seriousness of mine. I can be serious but it can never last. Again it's time to put a BIG full stop to this inconsistent serious-ness of mine.

i need to change my attitude. Tat's it.

i knw this is really random. But well, my forehead spells random so I'M JUST BEING RANDOM here. lol~
K then tat's all.ta's~